I know it is a cliche and I guess I am a rock too. This is hard to put out there without covering my frustration with humor but...well I have been on the road for a little more than a month and it is not easy. Yesterday I really felt lonely, like hit by a wall of it. I sat with myself most of the day and was patient with the feeling but it still hasn't totally left me. It is a feeling that although there are people around me, I don't know how to be with them and really want to be with you guys. I am missing a big part of the communication and don't understand body language here, I am putting the emphasis on the wrong syllable all the time. Yesterday I sat in a bar for a while and instead of the waiter asking me if I would like to order something he told me that if I want to sit here I must order something. Sort of the wrong part of the transaction to focus on at that moment. To pass time I am playing solitaire but can't finish a game without creating more than seven piles. I want to isolate myself and gather my thoughts but everything seems like a potential stressful interaction.
Well I want to document all of my trip on this blog so here is one of my low points. Greece is absolutly beautiful and being alone has its challenges in such a lovely place.
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I understand it is tough to be alone on the road in a different culture. It is good that you can share that feeling with everyone. Although we want you to be here with us, we are living your trip vicariously all the time.
ReplyDeleteIt was real good to speak with you on Tuesday morning.
I read your postcard from Fethiye, and I agree that we all need to spend a vacation trip there.
To break through this sense of isolation, may I suggest that you go on the bus tours of the island, or try the coffee shops (or equivalent) for people watching, or the local larger hotels with lobbies and what not? The tour could help introduce you into the local scene. Sometimes the best way to overcome the stress of interactions is to just jump in.
It is no shame to seek out familiar types from the States or other countries to commisserate over the Greek island cultural barriers that seem to separate people. Maybe that is why I like Boston, it is now a familiar place for me when I am alone there.
You know we will be here when you return, and we love you dearly.
Your photos have been wonderful, I liked the one of grandma sweeping her front door - it shows a fine eye.
And I like Vespas, and bicycles, and walking in the sun, and along the beaches.
Hi Hon,
ReplyDeleteI think dad may have a good point about taking tours. There's bound to be some Eng. speaking people on them. I also heard that this may be a common emotional thing that occurs when you are traveling alone. Hopefully it will pass soon. Looking forward to more beautiful pictures and the clever ones like the octopuses hanging on the backs of chairs. Love You. Mom
i am so proud of you for traveling alone...i spent 4 months in asia and didn't brave it to travel alone, not once. so i want you to take credit for taking a risk, and knowing that there are always some pluses and minuses. if it helps, WE MISS YOU LOTS here!!! we are thinking of you, loving you, missing your zany spirit and sense of humor. the cultural barriers can be tough...and you definitely learn so much more about yourself from the lows. LOVE YOU!!!
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to hear your loneliness. You are doing things most people will never do in their entire life. Just the other day one of my patients said she has never been out of the state of TX. She is 60. She said her hubby does not like to travel.
ReplyDeleteMy advice would be....always be yourself. Be kind, thoughtful and humane. I like to think this transcends culture, space and nationality. If others do not see this...they suck. Like Janis Joplin said..."you are all you've got. dont compromise yourself."
love,
erin